Christian Grey Needs a Role Modelįriends help us vent. Maybe the theme of the movie is that money doesn’t make you happy? Kudos. On top of it all, Christian has no social life.

(Swoon, right?) Except he only flies with the woman he’s wooing. Not like Tom Hanks in Big, but super sad bummer remix piano. Is Christian Grey a 90-year-old man in a slow, dramatic British film? He plays the piano. His mom has never seen him with a woman, which, adding that detail to his admission that fifteen women have come before Steele, Christian hides a huge area of his life from everyone (the women, not the playroom). Grey has a lot on his mind, but that’s not enough for me to believe they’re buddos.Ĭhristian has an adopted family but doesn’t seem to like them. He jogs until he’s sweaty and needs to take off his shirt - to reveal his killer chest and mysterious scars (ooh, what happened?!).īut where are his friends? Grey is 27 and doesn’t even have a sidekick? Like, how are you going to spend your money without an entourage? He has a driver, who is a pensive mix of pro wrestler and ex-Navy Seal. Here’s a guy who, we’re led to believe, is the Tony Stark of his world. I don’t mean that we see him glad-handing a group of fun bros at a steakhouse and never see them again, I mean Christian Grey literally has zero friends.

I Kept an Open Mind, Except…Īll of these sprinkles on the sadist cake distract from one major flaw in Christian Grey: the dude has no friends. Spoiler: Christian likes washing the woman he invites to live at his apartment like a quasi-prisoner. Throughout, there are charming moments of spanking, romance, and a weird, awkward bathtub scene where I thought I missed that Steele had been rendered incapable of washing herself due to a horrific accident. Maybe he deals with contracts so much that they get him off? I enjoyed that angle, but wish there were loud, scene-causing arguments over The Contract at a fancy dinner or two. The crux of the movie hinges on Steele signing the contract.

There’s a spark, they spend some cute nights together, and conflict arises when he wants her to sign an NDA - typical billionaire - so he can dominate her with a superfluous collection of whips and handcuffs.

About to graduate college, Anastasia Steele (Dakota Johnson) fills in for her friend and interviews billionaire Christian Grey (Jamie Dornan), who only seems to employ good looking women. The plot of Fifty Shades of Grey generally makes sense.

Fifty shades of grey nda contract